I pride myself on maintaining a generally calm demeanor, an ability to roll with the punches while seeing both sides of an issue and then taking action accordingly. Not only am I a child of the ’60s (Arroyo Grande Union High School class of 1967), but I am also a Libra who wants everyone balanced and even-tempered.
Which is why I am so aggravated with myself this evening, as well as with my spouse-who-lives-across-town. In most long-term relationships — successful or otherwise — the participants develop a ritual dance of sorts that enables them to maneuver through the hills and valleys of life. In successful relationships, the dance becomes a waltz, with the partners dipping and swirling through life’s experiences in three-quarter time. In more questionable relationships, the dance may resemble a Devo concert…dissonance and confusion with intermissions of relative quiet, then dissonance again.
My Libra tendencies have led me to try to waltz to the sounds of Devo, and I thought I was succeeding fairly well, until tonight’s relapse into full-blown enabling sent me straight to the Scotch and soda when I returned home. Those of you who know me well also know I don’t do that anymore. That was the old me, long defeated. But tonight the pissed-off me did exactly that, and really shattered my equanimity.
Tomorrow is another day, and another journey towards balance. Sweet dreams.