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I have never shied away from jury duty. In fact, I have often considered myself to be a “model” juror — open-minded, articulate, reasonably well-educated, with very little prejudice — in short, the kind of person I would want on the jury were I being tried.

My first trial experience was as a juror on a lying-in-wait murder case. The photographs and testimony we heard were grisly and gave me nightmares for weeks, but looking back I remember it as an overall positive experience. I served as Jury Foreman on a drug conspiracy case, where I had my first experience with a juror who was so narrow-minded and stubborn that he nearly made me scream!

There have been a number of less-memorable trials along the way, as well as a couple where I was let go without being impaneled. My last three times I have not been able to report as requested, for a variety of very solid reasons. Which leads me to today.

Today I’m feeling as though I am no longer smart enough to be a juror. I’m wondering what peers would want me serving on their jury. It happened like this:

For a couple of weeks I have been anticipating my 6:00 p.m. phone call to the Tulare County Superior Court to see whether my group would have to report in the morning for jury duty. I wrote it in my calendar, told my family about it, made sure that my day was cleared and the girls would be properly chauffeured in my absence. Then I waited until (almost) 6:00 p.m. to make the requisite call. Walked my fingers through the telephone prompts, then listened through the whole recording as groups before and after mine were either called, put on reserve, or excused. My number was not called.

As I picked up my summons to double-check my group number, a tiny date caught my eye. 03/18/2014. Yesterday. YESTERDAY!!! I missed my summons date!

I am left with only one possible conclusion: I have become too stupid for jury duty.

What do you think the Court will say tomorrow when I call with my explanation? Will they agree with my conclusion?
I wonder.