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I want my Mother! I was disasterizing my bedroom closet in an attempt to make my room less jam-packed and more pleasant, and I ran across one of her journals. She had been given so many beautiful ones, but mostly she wrote on whatever lined paper was handy. Here is part of her entry from June 29, 1999. It made me cry for missing her so.
My feet are bare and I’m standing in a small patch of soft dirt that feels so warm and good. I’m watching a “snake” lizard sunning himself on a large piece of firewood, and thinking.
I’m thinking about that little girl I was so long ago with the loose black hair flying in the wind and running barefoot in the hot dirt.
She had a quick laugh and a too loud voice. But outside in the Summertime running barefoot it seems to me now she felt wild & free & very very happy.
Is she still here someplace deep inside? Of course she is. Why would I ever let her go?
No wonder you are such a thoughtful and observant writer. You embody your mother and all her soulfulness.
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Thank you, Suzy. I couldn’t ask for a nicer compliment. – Fawn
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I love this picture of Mom. I have it framed on my dresser. I know we miss her every day, but some days are so hard. Just when I think I can’t stand it another moment I’ll run across a letter from her or hear her voice saying something funny to me. And of course talking to you, Dad and Donnie helps so much too. love you
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Especially when I am struggling with something that was a challenge to her, too…like the neverending battles with clutter and “stuff”, then to see her handwriting and hear her voice in my head completely undoes me. But as someone posted today on FaceBook (I’m paraphrasing here), we wouldn’t miss her so if we hadn’t loved her so much. Love you back – Me
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This is a beautiful post, Fawn. I so dearly miss my mother too. I wish my mom had kept a journal — what a gift! And what a beautiful photo of your mother. Have a Happy Easter! 🌺🐣
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Thank you so much…I’ve missed you! – Fawn
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I took a little break, Fawn. And now I’m back but just not blogging as much. Happy Easter to you and your family! 🙂
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